Monday, October 15, 2018

Cousins Rock



Do you have cousins? Did you grow up spending time with them? Do you still keep in touch? Thankfully I can answer yes to all three of these questions. I can honestly say that my cousins helped me to become the person I am today - and I'll leave it to you to decide if that's a good thing, or not.

On my Mom's side (Ayers) there are 13 cousins, total. Take away myself and my brother, that leaves me with 11 first cousins. On my Dad's side (Minnix) there are 8 cousins, total. Same calculation leaves me with 6 first cousins. So all in all, I have 17 first cousins. An "embarrassment of riches" as someone much wiser and more well-spoken than I once said.

Of the Ayers cousins, I am number three - and the first girl. I remember spending summer days at my grandparents' farm in Huddleston trying, and failing, to keep up with my older boy cousins, Bob and Allan. No matter how much I wanted to run around barefooted, like them, I was never able to toughen up my tender feet, and was generally sporting at least one badly stubbed toe. So I spent most of my time waiting on the porch for the boys to get back from their various adventures, while dressing up the least wild cat I could catch in doll clothes. Regardless of the age and gender differences, I always looked forward to the boys' annual summer visits to our grandparents from their home in Greenville Alabama.


Here's a photo of 8 of the 13 first cousins, circa 1962. I'm on the left, rocking my pedal-pushers, holding my baby brother, Jay. The little redhead next to me, charming Tambra Jo, is Dale. Bob, the oldest, is holding Tambra. Tim, pensively chewing his thumb, is between Bob and Allan (on the right) holding Vickie. Jan (next in age after me) is missing from the photo, as are Ricky, Jimmy, Mike, and Tonya, who weren't even a gleam in their parents' eyes yet.

We didn't see much of Jan growing up as her father was in the military and they were stationed overseas. One thing I do remember about her was when they returned to the states from Germany and came to Vinton to visit with us before moving on to Florida. She and her family spent several days at our house that summer. I don't think it was a particularly hot summer, but it was before my dad added central air conditioning to our house. Coming from the cool temps and low humidity of Germany, Jan suffered in the summertime heat. I'll never forget her mopping her brow and saying, "It sure is hot here in Florida." I didn't have the heart to tell her that she was in Virginia, and a long way from Florida, where it would be considerably hotter. Guessed she'd figure that out for herself soon enough. Funny thing was, years later when she would visit us from Florida, she would freeze in the Virginia "cold."

Tim was (and still is actually) a funny, creative kid. Born on Halloween about five year after me, we spent many Sunday afternoons together trying to find something interesting to do. Tim liked to cook, so to keep him busy while she prepared a meal for the crowd of family gathered for Sunday dinner, Grandma would give him a small saucepan filled with a couple of inches of water and a hotdog, which he "cooked" over one of the heat registers in the floor of the dining room. He was also instrumental in encouraging tent-making in the front yard. We'd drag out Grandma's quilts and old spreads, drape them over the lawn furniture, and spend hours crawling in and out of our masterpiece of engineering (and rebuilding it when the younger kids knocked it down.) Or once, when our grandparents had to replace their refrigerator, we spent an entire day playing in the empty box. Who needs video games when you have imagination?

My mom and her sisters were always very supportive of one another, especially when someone was sick or a baby was born. My mom went to Richmond to be with my Aunt Vi when Dale came into their life and Vi came to Vinton to help out when my brother, Jay, was born. Red-haired, freckle-face, Dale was full of life and energy and joy, and we all enjoyed having him around. My dad, in particular, liked to tease him. Of course my dad like to tease everyone! One thing I'll never forget about Dale is that he bounced when he walked - literally bounced - bobbing up and down on the balls of his feet with every step he took. And he was always dressed to the nines. Vi starched and pressed his "dungarees" to knife-edges sharpness and polished his white high-tops to a pristine shine.

Tambra Jo is Tim's younger sister. She is only a month older than Jay, who is nine years my junior. Her family was transferred to Birmingham when she was little, so I don't remember much about her way back then, except that she was adorable and sweet-faced. Tonya, their youngest sibling didn't come along until after the family moved to Alabama, and being that she's the youngest of my cousins, I didn't really get to know her until she was an adult. Now I love spending time with her and her gorgeous daughters.

Vickie and her younger brother, Jimmy, and Ricky and his brother, Mike, were considerably younger as well, so I don't have many memories of them as children. Except for our Easter egg hunts, that is. Every Easter, Grandma would dye a couple dozen eggs that the older cousins would hide for the younger ones to find. It was great fun, well, aside from the Easter when Grandma forgot to cook the eggs first. After that year we always used plastic eggs for the hunt.

All in all, Sunday afternoons at Grandma and Grandaddy Ayer's with the cousins were the best. There was always someone to play with and something to do - badminton or croquet in the summer, and making a fort in the upstairs of the house in the winter. I can't imagine what my childhood would have been like without my cousins.

While my Ayers grandparents lived in the country, my Minnix grandparents lived in the city. We visited with them every Sunday, too, usually right after church. I loved to sit in the swing on their front porch and watch the cars whiz by. Plus, I had the wonderful advantage of living right up the street from four of my Minnix cousins, so they were regular playmates for my brother and me.

On Sunday mornings, we'd sit around the kitchen table and wait for Grandma to pop popcorn for us or scoop out ice cream cones. I was the oldest of the Minnix grandchildren (and the most spoiled according to all reports.) Melanie came along three years after me, followed by Linda, Keith, my brother Jay, Gail, Tina, and finally Robert. Melanie was one of my best pals growing up. We spent countless hours dressing Barbie dolls, coloring, playing tag or kickball, riding bikes, swinging on the neighbor's swing-set, and generally roaming around in the neighborhood. Her brother, Keith, was idolized by my brother, Jay. They spent at least as many hours together as Melanie and I did, playing GI Joe or generally running amok.

I'll never forget going to my cousin's house and watching Gail (same age as Jay) when she was still crawling, scooting up and down their hardwood hallway, while her siblings ran from her in mock terror, calling her "Monstro!" Of course that business was instigated by Keith, but we all participated. Robert came along 13 years after me, so I never spent much time with him growing up. In fact, I babysat his siblings while his mom was in the hospital after his birth. It' hard to believe that Robert, the youngest of my Minnix cousins, has two grown sons.

Linda and her sister, Tina, lived fairly close by as well, so we saw them often, too. Linda got a lot of teasing from all the cousins because, even at age two, she was a girl who knew exactly what she wanted. Smart and determined, she tried her best to organize us all to do her bidding, though her efforts were generally wasted on the rest of us incorrigible heathens. Tina was quite a bit younger, so I don't remember her as well, except for the summer when I babysat for them while their mom worked. Tina was supposed to take a nap every afternoon, but that rarely happened. Tina did not like to take a nap but preferred to stay up with her sister and me, to make sure she didn't miss out on anything fun.

Thankfully, I am still close to my Ayers and my Minnix cousins. Though we don't see each other often, we do so whenever we can. Plus we keep up on social media and through messaging. I feel so lucky and so blessed to have spent my childhood with these special people. We share so many wonderful experiences and memories. If you don't have cousins like mine, you don't know what you've missed!

Cousins Rock!!


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